49 posts tagged “where-is-the-love”
I wonder if my dad were still alive, how would he feel about his older brother marrying again?
A year after the Edison Chen scandal first broke out... investigation is ongoing, there are death threats on Edi (that have prevented him from returning to Hong Kong) and Gillian Chung is preparing for a comeback (still trying to sell her virginal, big-eyed look... rolls eyes). Cecilia Cheung was the first to grant an interview about the scandal, talking in her characteristic feisty manner on what she and her family have been through. But who I really admire in all the hoohah over the scandal? Nicholas Tse, HK's resident bad boy no less and Ceci's husband. Ah Boy & Ah Girl's story is turning out to be one love story that I thought I'd only see in dramas. The way Nic talks about what his wife had been through and his commitment to her, how he recalled the night he first learned about the nude photos, woah. Stuffs riveting dramas are made of.
"I've known her for so long, do you think I am unaware of her personality and what she has done in the past? When I kneeled down before her to propose then, I told myself: Nic, you are such a male chauvinist; since you are sure you want to propose today, you have to accept her past, be it good or bad. On the day the scandal broke out, I reminded myself again that I have to support her. So I told her: It is ok, I'm here for you; don't cry, everything will be fine."
And when I got to this line, I got teary eyed: "I can only silently support her in my heart. I will not be talking about this scandal ever again because it has passed. You think I don't have my own past history? I don't have flaws? Perhaps I have more than her. It is meaningless to keep talking about the past when we are moving forward."
I'm not a fan of Nic or Ceci but I admire them for standing by each other the past year. Tough love. Makes me sigh.
I asked my Chinese friend how she was celebrating her Valentine's day and she said her husband told her they're not going to celebrate it since she's not his "qing ren". Qing ren in Mandarin means lover or a third party in a relationship and Valentine's Day is called Qing Ren Jie (jie meaning festival) in China. Though "qing ren" also means the one you fall in love with, it's the lover connotation that sticks I guess. I was laughing when she explained it to me.
So how are you going to spend your qing ren jie?
帶我走 到遙遠的以後
Take me away, to the far future
帶走我 一個人自轉的寂寞
Take away my recurring loneliness
帶我走 就算我的愛 你的自由 都將成為泡沫
Take me away even if my love, your freedom will becomes bubbles
我不怕 帶我走
I'm not afraid, take me away.
It looked like a scene from one of those Asian dramas...or maybe I have just been watching too much of them that I sometimes see things as if I was looking at a TV screen.
The taxi had dropped me off across the street and this being Beijing, the road was so wide I had to figure out where to cross and not be ran over by a random car. When finally I made it to the other side, I stopped before the young guard in the green uniform standing alert at the gate. The business card flew from my hands and I ran to chase it from the wind. The young guard looked momentarily distracted before straightening up to attention. Just as I looked up, I saw him already at the front of the building grinning. Shit. I have never felt so clumsy and ditzy in my entire life. He looked preppy that day, his skin darker from the last time I saw him months ago. And that time in March, I wasn't also prepared yet to see him and was my clumsy self. Why does he always have to catch me in my unguarded moments?
If only things were easy and we could just go far away.
In Hanoi last week...
me: "So you're based in Shanghai? Then RZ (saying his Chinese name) is your boss?"
FM: "Yeah... we worked in HK together."
me: "Really?"
FM: "Yeah, we're part of the so-called HK clique."
Small world. And I shut my mouth after that.
Carrie runs out of the limo in her Vivienne Westwood wedding dress towards Big.
"I knew you'd do this to me. You humiliated me!" While hitting Big with the bridal bouquet.
Miranda pulls her back, the white petals of the flowers scatter all over Big, on the car, on the street.
She hugs Charlotte tight as her friends lead her back to the car,
"Carrie, wait. Don't go."
Charlotte, looking ferocious, turns back. "NO!"
I fought back a sob over this scene. It was the most powerful scene in Sex and the City The Movie and like most people, I had to bite my tongue to keep from crying loudly. You know, the kind of scene that will make you bawl if only you were watching it in the confines of your home and there's no one to see you make a fool of yourself. I felt her pain and I wished I could enter the screen to help her bash Big with that bouquet.
Saw him again. In three months, I saw how things have changed. In me. I have new dreams, new priorities, new feelings. So it's true. Time and tide waits for no man. Not even me for him. And I take this screenshot from Fated To Love You to describe how it's like to move on. Sometimes, without even realising it.
Shanghai, as depicted in the photo, is significant to him. He's been spending more of his time there, he said. That's why whenever I think of Shanghai, I think of him.
His family is from Sichuan. But thank God his family is safe and was not affected by the quake.
I just got an SMS from TS asking me to go to Jeff's house tomorrow. Am I in the mood for a night of Jay-and-Arashi-less karaoke across town?
AO sent me a four-year-old email to remind me how far I have come from that One Big Heartache. The benefit of hindsight really gives us a different perspective. The world didn't end, life went on. And I'm questioning my capability to love that way again.
It's easier to love someone you know will never be yours (and no, I am not talking about pop stars). No expectations and therefore, no messy heartaches afterwards.